September 11, 2019

Open Letter to a Woman


Dear Leader

If I were to ask people who know you best, what would they say about your leadership strengths?

If I were to ask you about your leadership strengths, how close would the answers be to theirs?

You always seem surprised by how the people around you view your strengths. I’ve been wondering, are you being influenced by something you have yet to grasp awareness of? Can you sense something stirring as you read this? Now I get that it’s very likely you pushed it back down again because the strength and tenacity of your current beliefs easily overwhelm any rebellious new ones. But did you feel it? Now, is there a wee bit of you questioning why you can’t see that clearly? To answer that, why don’t we look at where you are right now?

Things are not great, let’s be honest. Trying to live up to the expectations of others, changing your behaviours to “fit in” to the culture or making yourself invisible in order to remain under the radar mean you are playing really small. Maybe you thought these tactics made for an easy life, convinced yourself you’re only doing it until something better comes along or that another life event might alter the direction of your life path. Maybe you are just despondent because hard as you try, your peers seem to have the ability to overtake you and you have become a forgotten face in the crowd. Whatever the reason, it’s a pretty shitty way to live, right?

Now, take a look around you, how many truly great leaders can you reach out and actually touch? I’m guessing its far fewer than you’d like. Where are the role models, the mentors, the supporters? If you’ve landed well, you might have one or two people you can squeeze into some of these roles but are they committed to seeing you succeed? And it’s an awkward question but how many of these key people are women? I really want to believe that you can shout “Yes! I have some great women who help me!” and if you do, then it’s really true….. things are changing….. for the better and I’m off doing my happy dance.  

You are an awesome woman who’s going to change the world, keep doing more of that, please!

 Sadly though, many women I speak to are sorely lacking in their access to brilliant women, they are getting frustrated by this cry for more women leaders, they are well and truly over their equality campaigning because it’s become so very yesterday and we’re nearly as bored with that as (yikes I nearly said the “B” word) the current political crisis – yes I declared it a crisis, apparently that’s a thing these days. Feel free to call it what you will, can we at least agree it’s messy and we are getting a bit bored of it?

What will you do next? 

Will you wait for someone else to find the courage to step into the arena and be that bright light?   

Will you tell your closest colleague how they should be the one to step up and make the change? 

Will you even consider there might be someone far closer to home who’s better equipped to step onto that stage?

Before you crawl back into the shadows and try to pretend you didn’t get this far, let me ask you: 

  • Would you like to be inspired by a great leader, one who knows how to drive change, builds dynamic empowered teams and is deeply passionate about telling the story of why they do what they do?
  •  What would It feel like to be inspired and driven by your deepest why in every area of your life?
  •  How much could you achieve if you were alongside people working in alignment with your values and driven by the same passion?

That, dear woman, is exactly what you are denying the world when you hide in the shadows.

  YOU are the leader we need to make big change happen.

  YOU are the woman who can bring together the right people to work collaboratively and purposefully.

  YOU are the human being who would be joining other human beings in the mission to bring us back to sustainability.

Lurking in the shadows is no place for you.

The truth is you are merely denying yourself the fullness of who you really are and, if you are disinclined to allow it to be all about you, you are also denying the world the wisdom and experience of an amazing woman.

So what are you going to do about that? I’m serious now, think about it:

 How are you going to change the landscape of your corner of the world?

 I’m sorry, I didn’t hear that, what did you say????

I’m going to remind you that you don’t need to do it alone. You can reach out and ask for help. The world really does want to hear what you have to say so if you are struggling to find your voice, your passion, your purpose, stop trying to do it alone.

Yes, I am about to rally the cry for coaching, because maybe that’s just what you need right now.

Yes I am a wee bit biased, I’ve had the privilege of being coached by women and men who quite brilliantly, helped me to find my path and lovingly nudged me back on it when I tumbled back into the shadows. I know, coaching can liberate, elevate, accelerate and support you in ways you haven’t even begun to imagine. I am a certified coach and the best part of my day, is watching these amazing women light up.

Yes, I believe in you!

Please come out of the shadows, and if you want to talk about how I can support you, pick up the phone and call me.





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